Who’s in Charge? Programme & Training



Who’s in Charge?
3 Day Facilitator Training
ONLINE FULL1st, 3rd & 4th July2024
Who’s in Charge?
3 Day Facilitator Training
ONLINE14th, 16th & 17th October2024
Who’s in Charge?
3 Day Facilitator Training
ONLINE2nd, 4th & 5th December2024
Who’s in Charge?
3 Day Facilitator Training
Who’s in Charge?
3 Day Facilitator Training

We do not list In-House training events if they are not open to external practitioners. We do several In-house trainings each year. If you are looking for an In-House training please do contact us at: [email protected]

What the programme is and explanations

What the programme is and explanations

Who’s in Charge? is a 9 week child to parent violence (CPV) programme aimed at parents whose children are being abusive or violent toward them or who appear out of parental control.  The structure of the programme consists of 8 two and a half hour sessions with a two-month follow up.

Three Part Structure of the WIC? Group Programme

Part 1

The first part of the programme aims to change parental attitude, and in particular reduce blame, guilt and shame. A variety of exercises are used to deconstruct some of the unhelpful myths that parents have absorbed about their child’s behaviour. We aim to help parents and carers to understand that children’s bad behaviour is multi-causal, and we explore the nature of abuse, styles of parenting, entitlement and power and the social changes that make CPV more likely.

Excerpt – Eddie Gallagher – 2015 (Working with Adolescent Violence and Abuse Towards Parents; approaches and contexts for intervention.)

Part 2

The second part of the programme explores the use of consequences to change unwanted behaviour. This has similarities to the content of mainstream parenting programmes, but there are important differences. Most parenting advice assumes that children are co-operative. However, most parents who attend Who’s in Charge? typically have children who have stopped co-operating, who often appear to care about very little, who may deliberately sabotage parents attempts to apply consequences, and who may escalate their violence when parents implement behavioural control strategies.

In the group we explore the difficulty of identifying consequences that the parent can implement, is willing to control, and the child will care about (at least a little). We do not see the consequences in terms of behaviour modification, but in terms of empowerment of the parent; increasing the child’s respect for the parent, enabling the parent to be more assertive and altering the balance of positives and negatives that the young person experiences from their violent and controlling behaviour.

Excerpt – Eddie Gallagher – 2015 (Working with Adolescent Violence and Abuse Towards Parents; approaches and contexts for intervention.)

Part 3

The third part of the programme supports parents to make changes within the home while working on a few advanced topics; anger; assertiveness; self-care. The order of these topics is important. Until parents have made some attitude changes and become more empowered they are not usually ready to work on these topics. The anger topic is about their anger, as well as dealing with the young person’s anger. However, parents may not be ready to admit to, or work on their own inappropriate behaviour early in the group process.

So, the structure aims to first support and empower, second to encourage practical changes (usually in terms of rules and consequences) and third to reinforce these changes and cover some advanced topics. There is a steady reduction in content during the course of the group – the idea being that the group becomes more positive and helpful and thus discussion increases and facilitator directed exercises reduce.

Excerpt – Eddie Gallagher – 2015 (Working with Adolescent Violence and Abuse Towards Parents; approaches and contexts for intervention.)


Overall aims of Who’s in Charge? Groups

  • Reduce parent’s feelings of isolation.
  • Challenge parent’s feelings of guilt.
  • Lessen deterministic thinking about causes (e.g. “he can’t help it.. he has ADHD” or “… he saw his father be violent”) – it is always multi-causal.
  • Reinforce belief in possibility of change (without giving false hope or creating complacency).
  • Clarify boundaries of what is acceptable and unacceptable behaviour (harder than it sounds as there are many grey areas and we need to avoid imposing our own values).
  • Arm parents with some simple concepts that have proved empowering: e.g. entitlement, the power of being irresponsible, etc.
  • Examine strategies for creating meaningful and practical consequences for unacceptable behaviour. The approach of most parenting courses and materials is to assume that children are basically co-operative and only need encouragement and positivity to be good. These approaches usually have failed miserably with the oppositional children of the WIC? parents. Finding consequences for children who care about little and don’t want to co-operate is very difficult.
  • Explore anger, both children’s and (often more usefully) parents’.
  • Encourage assertiveness.
  • Encourage self-care.
  • Reinforce progress and provide emotional support while parents are attempting to become more assertive parents.

Programme Outline

  • Session 1  Introductions, questionnaires and genograms
  • Session 2  Cause and influences of abusive behaviour
  • Session 3  What is abuse?
  • Session 4  What can I control in my child’s life?
  • Session 5  Consequences
  • Session 6  Anger and breaking the myths of anger
  • Session 7  Assertiveness
  • Session 8  Self-care, future goal setting and evaluation
  • Session 9  Two month follow up on goal achievement, evaluation and further goals.
Who’s in Charge? Facilitator Training

Who’s in Charge? Facilitator Training

The training runs over three days and will cover the following aspects of the WIC? programme.

Going through the whole programme gave me an insight into how it would be perceived as a parent.

Who should attend?

This training is aimed primarily at those intending to facilitate the Who’s in Charge? group programme, although it has practical application to those working working 1:1 and with parents generally. Practitioners who have attended training come from a broad range of agencies, both statutory, voluntary and private sector including: youth offending, domestic abuse agencies, social workers children & young people’s practitioners, psychologists, therapists, third sector agencies, schools, youth workers, parenting practitioners, early help teams, SENCO’s, service managers, mental health workers, school nurses, troubled families, family carers and family group conference co-ordinators.

The whole training was useful as it was new learning on a professional level.

What does the training involve?

Pre-training information

Prior to attendance at the WIC? training participants will be sent a programme rationale with notes. It is expected that participants will have spent two hours minimum reading this document prior to attending the WIC? training.

The 3 day training is largely experiential, based around the exercises and discussions of a Who’s in Charge? group programme. Practitioners will have the opportunity to explore the programme in full, discuss the referral process, and setting up the programme.

Day One

An insight into understanding the context of child to parent violence and experiential journey through programme weeks 1 – 2, beginning with uncovering family patterns and encouraging parents to identify goals for change; what are the causes or influences of child to parent violence and abuse, understanding the difference between entitlement versus responsibility and exploring what influence parents have over their children.

Day Two

Experiential exploration of Weeks 3 – 6 including looking at abuse, parental influence & control and power over their children and equally how do children have influence, power and control over their parents. We move at this point from the therapeutic element of the programme towards the second part, the knowledge base and applying consequences to children who are uncooperative (sometimes in the extreme) and who may not appear to care very much about anything. Focus on the anger held by all family members involved.

Day Three

Weeks 7 – 9 includes supporting parents to be assertive in the face of CPVA and make changes and continuing to restore a positive relationship with their children, exploration of the ethos, philosophy and rationale of the WIC? programme, a group assessment via a multiple-choice questionnaire and a short group presentation, supporting practitioners to facilitate the Who’s in Charge? programme with confidence in their own settings and encouraging facilitators to continue the parents journey through future goal setting and programme evaluation and data collection.

Finally on completion

On successful completion of the three-day facilitator training participants will be eligible to run the Who’s in Charge? programme and will have access to a Private Area on the Who’s in Charge? website. Here they can download all the materials needed to run the nine week programme. There are no further license fees, enabling practitioners to run programmes immediately. It is expected that where possible newly trained facilitators take the opportunity to co-facilitate with an experienced WIC? facilitator prior to leading their own group.

To have a programme available for parents who are desperate to make changes and give parents/carers the strategies to make those changes.


Who’s in Charge? Training Testimonials

Who’s in Charge? Training Testimonials

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It is a rare thing to come away from training feeling that you absolutely have the confidence to run a programme straight away. Cathy & Carole are amazing trainers. They make everything so easily understandable. I am so much more informed and knowledgeable.

The Blue DoorScunthorpe, North Lincolnshire

The training went above and beyond. I learned more than I bargained for. One of the best courses I have been on. Brilliant, knowledgable trainers. I have come away feeling really inspired. I would highly recommend to other professionals.

DA Change Co-ordinatorNorfolk County CouncilNorfolk

The last three days has been intense and long, but I have learnt so much. the trainers knew exactly what they were talking about. Excellent training!

Wakefield Youth Offending TeamWakefield

Who’s in Charge? training has impacted on me massively as I have been verbally abused by my son over years. Even though he is now older, I will be using some of the strategies with him.The trainers were amazing and explained everything thoroughly at all times.

The Blue DoorScunthorpe, North Lincolnshire

Absolutely fabulous training. I have much greater insight into how many parents this issue affects. Carole & Cathy were amazing trainers, patient and able to explain everything in a supportive way. I loved each and every day.

Young Women’s Health ProjectSheffield

The training has made me realise that until completing the three days, I had very little awareness and knowledge of CPVA. I now feel confident to tackle issues and relate to parents experiencing CPVA. I have enjoyed my training very much and am now excited to go back and prepare for facilitating my own course. Thankyou for all your efforts in delivering a fab three days!

Andover Crisis & SupportHampshire

Excellent and enjoyable training. I have better awareness of the issues around CPVA and lots of new ideas and strategies to help try and address it. The training kept me interested and the three days flew by! This programme will be delivered many times I am sure.

Bolton Youth Offending TeamBolton

Facilitators are friendly, approachable and human, who both work so well with each other and the group. Brilliant training with knowledgable trainers who really care about the Who’s in Charge? programme and ethos.

Action for ChildrenNorfolk

Training was brilliant and beneficial to my practice.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingPortsmouth

A really good training, very realtive to my role with families. The three days were packed full of information.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingSpecialist Family Support WorkerPortsmouth

Very experienced and knowledgeable trainers.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingYouth Justice Officer/Social WorkerPortsmouth CouncilPortsmouth

I have worked with families for approximately 20 years – aways keen to learn new “skill ways”. Who’s in Charge? has given me completely new insight into managing CPV situations and dynamics.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingFamily Support WorkerPortsmouth CouncilPortsmouth

This was an informative, interactive and relaxed course with two very competant and friendly trainers. I would recommend this course to anyone working with families.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingDomestic Abuse Prevention Advocate (DAPA)Isle of Wight RefugeIsle of Wight

Really enjoyable and informative training. Thank you.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingFamily Support WorkerPortsmouth CouncilPortsmouth

Cathy and Carole were engaging and facilitated this training very well together. I instantly felt comfortable and found the training interesting and enjoyable. My confidence has grown.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingOutreach Worker Children & Young PeopleSouthern DASPortsmouth

I really enjoyed this training and look forward to delivering the programme. Really engaging and supportive trainers.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingSpecialist Domestic Violence & Abuse WorkerPortsmouth CouncilPortsmouth

Thank you both very much. I have really enjoyed this nformative and fun way of learning and I am looking forward to facilitating our own programme.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingDomestic Abuse AdviserWight DASHIsle of Wight

Very good training. It has increased my knowledge and understanding of CPV greatly. The information shared will not only inform my practice as a DA Outreach Worker but also my own parenting!

Who’s in Charge? TrainingDA Outreach WorkerYour SanctuarySurrey

Brilliant! This training has been a real eye opener. I have worked in this field for the last 11 years and this course has really changed the way I will be working with families in the future. I really believe this programme will help many families.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingOutreach WorkerYour SanctuarySurrey

Great programme for parents who may feel they have nowhere else to turn, delivered by engaging and knowledgeable trainers. Thank you for providing this training to us!

Who’s in Charge? TrainingPortsmouth CouncilPortsmouth

Really nice, approachable trainers who were happy to answer questions and had a wealth of knowledge.

Who’s in Charge? TrainingRestorative Justice WorkerPortsmouth CouncilPortsmouth

I feel confident and have gained greater knowledge in child to parent violence & abuse.

Who’s in Charge TrainingSenior PractionerSouthend Borough CouncilSouthend on Sea

Thank you for the excellent and fun training. I enjoyed every part of it!

Who’s in Charge? TrainingSenior PractitionerSouthend Borough CouncilSouthend on Sea

This was excellent training with good materials and helpful insights and stories from the knowledgeable facilitators. Looking forward to running the course!

Who’s in Charge? TrainingChief ExecutiveHomeStartCentral Beds

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